A Beautiful Mess

ImageWe start inservice in two days….  and yes, every year I look like the owl on the left!   It is who I am…. full of life, enthusiasm, joy, idealism….  and every year by May… well, let’s be honest, it’s really March… I look like the owl on the right.   I don’t know when it happens.  The day I scare myself to death because I almost overslept?  The day I’m so angry I could spit nails… at myself, for losing my temper with a kid?   The day the 4,017th piece of paper comes across my desk that has to be turned in… yesterday?

I LOVE my job.  I LOVE “my” kids.  And because I love these two things so much, sometimes I try to be superman.  I am not.  I get cranky.  I get tired.  I get tired of bureaucracy.   But I also refuse to temper my enthusiasm.

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I will be…. that person… that really annoying person who is so darn positive about all the changes and all the “stuff” that goes with teaching… that you really want to slap me in the face… or ask if I’m really that happy.   I want my kids to see this coming out of my heart and in my words and on my face… everyday.  Or close to it, since I’m really not superman.  I don’t know how much experience you have with teenagers, but every day is an adventure ~ and they are really good at reading people, so when I have a grumpy day… they mostly do, too.   I refuse to be that person that lets them give up on education or books.  I refuse to let them wallow in self-pity over things big or small ~ we all have to grow up and choose who we will be and how we will deal with crappy things.   My goal in life is to be the heart for all of my kids… I will fail some days, I will fail some kids, I’m sure… remember, I’m not superman… but it’s worth every minute of my 180 days I get with them.

 

ImageMy world of education is a beautiful mess.  (My desk, on the other hand, is really just a mess!)  I will choose to allow myself to be excited and embrace this year’s journey… regardless of change, curriculum, and paperwork.  I will (attempt) to be superman… at least for a few hours every day.   Saving teens from pimples, contacts, name-callers, and, most importantly, ignorance.

Happy August, friends…. it’s here…

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2 thoughts on “A Beautiful Mess

    • Megg…. for me, both are… but not necessarily in general. I take positivity and optimism to an extreme, I think. But I do think that intensely negative people have a much harder time influencing children. I also think optimism probably is a necessity at some level… If a teacher can’t be optimistic about his/her students, I’m not sure what the point is of teaching.

      I guess, bottom line, I think both make my job easier and more enjoyable, even though both may make me cry when I don’t get what I think is the best from either my kids or co-workers. Does that make sense?
      ~Anna

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